Thursday, November 03, 2005

Inquiring Minds Want to Know...Ok, So Maybe It's Just Me

- Why does Sean only wear socks that look as if they are from his grade school days? They're too small, smell rank and have huge gaping holes where his heel and toes are. (Yes, we've bought him new ones, but they sit in his drawer lonely and unused.)

- Why does Baden only attempt to hump me and never Sean? Although, Baden does try to distribute the raunchiness evenly. When we're in bed, Baden always makes sure that his ass is directed towards or next to Sean's head. Oh, and this is usually when he begins to fart. Baden burps, however, are saved for mommy. He'll draw me close with the pretense of puppy licks and then belch in my face. Yummy.

- How is it possible for a 13 pound cat more specifically, Mr. Tiny-Tigger-Toes Kitty, to stomp around upstairs and make floor boards creak? Dare I even wonder what he is doing? Probably plotting world domination.

- Why do my eyes only start itching when I lay down in bed and am trying to sleep? Might I be allergic to Burger-Butt?

- By all that is holy on this earth, when oh when, will my damn ears stop aching? I miss sleeping on my side and pillows, dear sweet lovely puffy pillows!

- Why does Baden insist on dragging dirty clothes from the hamper upstairs into the living room downstairs. His preferred clothing of choice- my underwear or Sean's socks. Yeah, it's a toss up as to which grosses me out more. (Disclaimer: Not that the panties are funky, but eeew putting someone's underwear in your mouth.) I know, too much info.

- Hmm, I wonder how many people will search for panty funk and stumble across this post. Who is more disturbing, me or them? hahahahaha


Blogger Beth said...

i often wonder things like that myself lisa...only slightly different and they usually involve my kids...while playing volleyball last night, i looked down and saw chocolate lip prints on the bottom part of my shirt...yep i got a chocolate hug from samuel at some point during the day, ha ha. makes me glad my dogs are both female though, no dry humping around these parts, no siree bob...

11/04/2005 10:12 AM  
Blogger West Coast Mia said...

I am also so glad that we have a female dog. When we went to the cabin Diana brought her dog and nobody could sit still on the couch because if you did you became an instant hump target. Between that dog and Marco's I don't think I ever want to own a male dog. Their lipstick touching my arm or leg just grosses the heck out of me. Tara's dog loves her panties. I don't understand the fascination with them. I think it comforts them because they smell like you. And I am loving my dog right now. She doesn't hump, chew on socks or underwear she is a boring dog. I love her so much.

11/04/2005 7:12 PM  
Blogger Mama C-ta said...

Ugh, my dog does the same nasty crap! Always my underware, always. Or her new thing is my breast pads...mmm breastmilk.

11/04/2005 10:18 PM  
Blogger Zube Girl said...

My cats sound like elephants sometimes. I don't get it either.

11/05/2005 9:59 AM  

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