Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Evil Thy Name is Love Handles

So Miss Ang, one of my bridesmaids/ex-roomie/work office mate, came over the other night to pick up Jazz-cat who I was pet-sitting for her. She had on the cutest sweater coat which I discovered she got from Target. Last night after dinner at Famous Dave's, Sean and I stopped over at Target. I tried the sweater on, in a different color of course, but it was not nearly as flattering on me. Not to mention, the size I would have had to purchase in order for it to fit correctly was not one that I was willing to buy. I decided to give another sweater coat a try. Yeah, this one didn't look to great either. In fact I noticed a distinct bulging as it skimmed over the sides of my lower waist. Hmm, what could that be I wondered? Was there something wrong with the cut of the sweater? Oh no, it had nothing to do with the article of clothing, but rather the body underneath.

So I have a couple of questions:
- When the hell did I get love handles?
- Real life friends did you notice them? If so, let a gal know!
- How do I make them disappear NOW!!!
- Dear God, I think I see stretch marks over them! This must be a cruel joke and I will hunt down and punish the responsible party.
- I don't like this whole thing called aging, so please make it stop.

Have I mentioned how incredibly depressing this is? To add insult to injury. I came across a photo from a few years ago when I was a bit thinner. Wow, where did that girl go and how do I bring her back without having to give up sweets or start exercising? :) Ok, so actually, I don't want to be that size again...I was too thin and didn't look healthy especially my face. But I remember that time period and even then thinking that I wasn't thin and could stand to lose a few pounds. What the hell was wrong with me? I wonder if as women, we're ever really happy with our body? If there's some of you out there who are, well god bless ya! And what's your secret- spill now!!


Blogger Bailey's Mom said...

We are definetly NEVER happy with our bodies - it is one of the many sucky things us women have to deal with :(

You are STILL super super skinny so maybe you should run to the eye doctor and get another test.

Why is it that no matter how often our friends, husbands or other loved ones tell us how great our bodies look - we will always find a flaw????

10/11/2005 3:58 PM  
Blogger LaLa Lisa said...

E- Ok, glad it's not just me. I'm sure all the media images contribute and my addiction to shows like Extreme Makeover and Dr.90210. Hehe.

Nah, you know you need to drop a few when your own naked image in the mirror makes ya scared. Haha!

I guess it's just that internal voice that says oh well they're just being nice, would they really tell you that you look like a heffer. Sean's just excited that as my weight goes up so does the size of my chest. *lol* Although he did feel the need to point out some butt stretch marks to me not too long ago when he ever so naively asked what they were. Yeah, he was on my sh*t list. :)

10/11/2005 4:04 PM  
Blogger Beth said...

well while i could live without the stretchmarks, the jelly belly, droopy boobs and many other things that have happened to my body since descending into motherhood...it doesn't keep me awake at night...i know i eat fairly healthy and i play volleyball and as soon as zoe sleeps through the night i'll wake up in the morning to go jogging around the track behind my house, then i'm not too bothered by it..the standards for women are much higher than they are for men and i personally think that sucks :P ..as for you..you look great woman :)

10/11/2005 5:53 PM  
Blogger LaLa Lisa said...

Bethers- See, but you have a perfectly reasonable and justifiable reason for any extra weight. Good heavens woman you just gave birth! Actually you have 3 reasons! :) Maybe John should count as a reason too. Haha! I have no such excuse. Other than my damn metabolism rebelling against me and taking a permanent vacation. You'll wake up and go jogging? Damn, why can't I be motivated to do that? I could be motivated to run down our flight of stairs to the kitchen if I knew a chocolate custard doughnut was waiting for me. hehehehe

10/11/2005 6:10 PM  
Blogger Beth said...

*lmao* @ visual of you racing down the stairs for a donut *imitates homer simpson doooo nuuuuut* ... in all honesty it's about the only time i get to myself. as it is, in my sleep deprived world, i wake up a half hour before i have to get kaylin ready for school because of the quiet alone time..i take what i can get, when i can get it i guess :) .. john's a BIG reason btw :P

10/11/2005 7:55 PM  
Blogger West Coast Mia said...

Welcome to my world sweetie. One day a woke up and realized my metabolism got up and left in the middle of the night and has not come back. When I came home from Louisiana and I was 119 at 5'7" I still looked in the mirror and found all the jelly rolls and the stretch marks. Now I would give my big toe to be back to that size. :)
As women we will never be 100% stisfied with our bodies and it sucks. If men only new the mental torture we go through on a daily basis over our bodies the would be a lot nicer to us. :)
But outside of your eyes when people look at you they see a skinny beautiful woman. Cross my heart and hope to die they don't see the imperfections that you do. You are gorgeous from the tip of your head to your tiny little toes.

10/12/2005 12:03 PM  
Blogger Kjersten said...

I heard the best name ever for love handles on E! the other day. Muffin-tops... funny, huh!

You are definitely skinnier than me and I have never noticed anything but thinness.

I have the tummy pooch and I hate it. Even with dieting and exercising, it is taking forrreeeever to lose. I am considering just buying a girdle.

10/12/2005 3:13 PM  
Blogger Zube Girl said...

Ooh, I know this evil! And I also used to be too thin, and now feel like I've put on a little too much.

I don't know that I'll ever be completely satisfied.

10/12/2005 7:18 PM  

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